A survivor.

Pain is underrated, maybe because it’s one of the most common feelings one experiences. Also it is the most frequently used word in many phrases distinctly related to disappointment, displeasure and disloyalty.
We all go through phases of time when life is a blur, when you lose your perspective because the pain you feel is so strong, and the more you try to control it, to manage it, the more the pain increases.
We all know that a mask exists, the one we put on from time to time, the one with a smile plastered and eyes that shine with excitement all the time, that’s the mask we’re all aware of, though we rarely admit to its existence in our lives, but through time and time again, we use it to get by, when the day gets tough, when you’re obligated to feel fine even if you’re not, when it is a necessity for you to be okay even if you’re not. You simply, pretend.
You can harden yourself; you can be pretentious and convince yourself that even though you took a fist in the heart, even though every ounce of strength you have left to go on maybe crumbling right ahead of you, even though you’re bleeding with every second that passes, and you know that the clock is ticking, and you’re not healing, you’re ongoing to the path of recovery and you tell yourself that it doesn’t get to you, you make-believe even for a moment, that you’re not drowning in self-pity, and you try too hard to not wallow in self loathing because you knew you were standing on the edge, you knew if you took that step, that if you tried to reach out, you’d slip through the cracks that formed with every storm that passed by, and they weakened the foundation, yet, you took the slip, you risked the fall, because somewhere along the fall, you knew you could survive the pain, you knew you would end in pain, but you also barely understood, that you would come out of it, a survivor.


1 Comment

  1. Loving how you write such arresting posts on topics that most can’t express much about other than the conventional thoughts!

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